Life is a therapist...

A girl continuously checks her phone to see if the boy she's interested in has called or texted her back. He was texting with her all day yesterday, and now all of a sudden, the messages have stopped. Maybe he's just busy... or maybe he's changed his mind about her? Did he 'come to his senses' and realize she's not good enough after all? Maybe she'll send him one more message, just to see if he responds.  A writer feels paralyzed; none of the ideas he's already come up seem to be worth writing about and he's scrapped them all. Unless he can write the most expressive, significant, thought-provoking piece of prose, what's the point of even picking up the pen and getting started? No one wants to read something that's simply substandard, after all. He'd become the laughing stock of the writing community and never be taken seriously. He'll just wait for a better idea to come along...it's bound to happen sooner or later.   A woman c...

I have been out of the private practice loop for a couple of months now because I haven't been getting too many referrals. I have a couple of 'regular' clients who generally tend to book every one to three weeks with me, but they haven't called to rebook sessions for a while now. I've thought about calling them to  'check in' since it's been so unlike them to leave so much time between sessions, but am torn as to whether this would be a good idea or not. On the one hand, check-in calls could reassure clients that you're there for them even when they aren't physically in session with you, and that you cared enough to follow up and see if they're okay. They might feel appreciative of having the opportunity to talk about anything troubling or stressful that might be going for them, and the call could serve as a friendly reminder that support remains available should they wish to resume therapy in the future. On the other hand, checking in c...

I recently completed the first of three modules in a course on text-based counselling, or "cybercounselling". I'm interested in learning more about this fascinating method of service delivery so that I can eventually expand my own practice and reach out to a wider population of clients. I had a lot of questions about e-counselling before I started the course (and still have many now!). Murphy and Mitchell (1998) address many of them in their article, "When writing helps to heal: E-mail as therapy" . According to these authors, one of the primary concerns with online counselling is the question of whether a strong therapeutic alliance can be established. They posit that "a growing relaxation, informality, receptivity and trust" (p. 22) are among the primary components of a therapeutic alliance. They cite previous research suggesting that the actual method of communication has minimal effect on the strength of relationships formed, that any differenc...

I often struggle with how to end sessions with my clients, particularly following a difficult or distressing session. More than once it has happened where a flood of emotion is experienced just as our time is about to come to an end; most recently one of my clients came to the realization that her experiences growing up with an alcoholic father and overbearing mother were affecting her own relationships with men. She sat quietly for 45 minutes, answering my questions and relating painful memories, but it was only as we were wrapping up our hour that she became tearful, relating how she had never before put the puzzle pieces together in quite the way that we just had. We discussed how we could work through some of these issues more fully in future sessions and my client was very amenable to this, but I couldn't help but feel guilty for leaving her with this "unfinished" business. I have noticed that I feel this way at the end of many sessions, and end up feeling obligate...

Ov er the weekend I stumbled onto a blog that seems to be exactly what I've been searching for in terms of practical ideas for counselling rather than just overviews of various theories and methodologies. It is the Canadian Counselling and Psychotherapy Association (CCPA)'s Counselling Connect , the "new blog where you will find stories, perspectives and ideas about the profession of counselling and psychotherapy in Canada."  So far I love it, and I hope you will too! I've already been inspired by new ideas for my own practice as well as information on continuing education and certification courses that are available to me. The tags are very helpful in bringing you to the specific posts that will be of most interest/relevance to you. My only real disappointment is that, so far, there doesn't seem to be very much in the way of commenting or discussions. I am hesitant to leave many comments of my own as a result -- cue memories of being back in the classroom ...